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Will You Be My Bridesmaid? A Proposal Guide

Will You Be My Bridesmaid? A Proposal Guide

Party Lines: Your Bridesmaid Proposal Guide

Getting ready to pop the (other) question? A bridesmaid proposal is a fun and thoughtful way to let your friends know how much you value their support as you plan your wedding. Read on for creative ways to propose to your 'maids, plus tips for choosing your bridal party.

How to Choose Bridesmaids

Before you get to your bridesmaid proposals, you have another important task: deciding who will be in your bridal party. We’ve answered the most common questions that brides have about etiquette as they assemble a wedding party.

Q: How many bridesmaids should I have?

A: The size of your bridal party is a matter of personal preference. An expansive guest list can dictate a larger party, while you may prefer just a single 'maid for an intimate ceremony. Ultimately, your party can be any size that allows you to include the people who matter to you the most.

Q: Who should I choose to be a bridesmaid?

A: A bridesmaid can be anyone who will be there to help you prepare for your big day. If you have a sister or sister-in-law, she’s likely to be at the top of your list. Many brides also include their best friends, cousins, and other close family members.

Q: Is there a minimum age for bridesmaids?

A: Many brides set the minimum 'maids age at 21; this allows the entire party to join in the bachelorette festivities and helps ensure everyone is prepared to take on the responsibilities of the role. If there’s a younger sister, cousin, or family friend you’d like to include, consider adding a junior bridesmaid to your party.

Q: Do I need to have bridesmaids?

A: There are pros and cons to foregoing a wedding party entirely. Couples planning an elopement or surprise wedding often choose to skip the bridal party; similarly, a large group of bridesmaids and groomsmen might feel overwhelming at a very small ceremony. You could also ask a few close friends to take part in your wedding preparations less formally; for example, joining you for dress shopping and a bachelorette party without the official title of bridesmaid.

Q: Do I need to limit my bridal party to women?

A: Not at all! This is a dated "rule." Your “bride mates” can include anyone who is important to you.

Q: How do I choose a Maid of Honor?

A: As the title suggests, it’s a big honor to ask someone to be your Maid of Honor! However, this role also comes with the most responsibility. Most brides choose a sister or best friend to serve as Maid of Honor; whoever you choose, she’ll be by your side during all the highs and lows of wedding planning.

Before You Ask: Tips & Considerations

Just like a marriage proposal, a bridesmaid proposal usually isn’t a complete surprise. Before asking your prospective 'maids, chat about the responsibilities and costs involved. Weddings can be an emotional time, so asking these practical questions ensures that the lead-up to your wedding day is a smooth process.

Events: Outline which pre-wedding events you’d like your 'maids to attend, and which ones they’ll be responsible for planning. Consider your bridal shower, bachelorette party, engagement party, and rehearsal dinner, as well as less formal occasions like bridesmaid dress shopping and assembling favors.

Costs: Money is always awkward to talk about, even with your closest friends. However, you never want your bridesmaids to feel overwhelmed or blindsided by wedding expenses. Be sure to talk about a comfortable price point for bridesmaid dress shopping, and tell your 'maids as soon as possible if you’re planning a destination wedding or bachelorette party.

Other Responsibilities: Give your 'maids a heads-up if you’ll be relying on them for other parts of the wedding planning process, such as décor assistance. Decide which members of the wedding party will give speeches, and who will take on day-of tasks (think ushering wedding guests to their tables, and making sure the guestbook gets signed).

How to Propose to Your Bridesmaids

You’ve picked your 'maids, you’ve asked the tough questions … now, it’s time for the fun part! There are endless sweet and inventive ways to propose to your 'maids; here are a few of our favorites.

1. Deliver a balloon or flower bouquet to each 'maid, along with a personalized note. Bonus points if the bouquet offers a first glimpse of your wedding color scheme!

2. Gift a Ring Pop in a keepsake box. Who could say no to candy?

3. Create custom champagne or wine labels asking the all-important question. (Then, open it up and celebrate!)

4. Gather everyone for a mani-pedi date, so they can enjoy some pampering before they help you start planning.

5. Host a dinner party at your place or take them out for brunch. This is also a great way for your 'maids to meet and mingle if they come from different parts of your life.

6. Attend a workshop or class together. Flower arranging, cocktail making, painting – pick a class that’s lighthearted and will give you plenty of time to chat.

7. If your 'maids are far away, a thoughtful package is a great way to pop the question and say thanks in advance for all their help. Pick a theme or color scheme, and then fill a box with little gifts like lip balm, nail polish, jewelry, pajamas, champagne flutes, hair ties, or a clever custom t-shirt.

8. Just ask! If you’re a laid-back bride, there's no need to overthink things. Simply find time for a one-on-one chat with each 'maid and enjoy your time together.
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